1 And it came to pass in the latter part of the second week of the current month, I did labor in my yard. And whilst I did labor, the fruit of my loins came unto me, having been previously anointed with sunscreen to protect him from the heat of the day, and he saith unto me, "Daddy, you need sunscreen." And being in an hurry and desiring not to cease from my labors I did reply, "Daddies don't need sunscreen." And the fruit of my loins was pacified in this thing. And when the sun had set, I did visit a neighbor, who upon seeing the redness of my arms and my legs declared that I had seen much sun. And verily it was that my epidermis had been burned.
2 And not many days previous, I and all my household had begun to employ a custom of singing "Scripture Power" at the coming of the hour which is appointed for the reading of the sacred texts (and this custom is one that was borrowed from a neighbor and hath been altered by us, which thing seemeth me good after having read "Righteous Traditions" by Sister Lant). And a few of the words of the hymn which we sing are these: "Scripture power keeps me safe from sin. Scripture power is the power to win. Scripture power! Ev'ry day I need The power that I get each time I read."
3 And it came to pass that when the sabbath day was come and whilst traveling unto the place of worship, where it was expected of me to impart unto my brethren of the church a spiritual thought, my eyes were opened that I saw in this thing a lesson to be learned, and the lesson is on this wise:
4 All men everywhere, including daddies, are in need of sunscreen. No person, no not one, is immune from the dangers posed in this increasingly wicked world. Therefore, let us be diligent in putting on our spiritual sunscreen by feasting on the words of Christ. And when thou hearest a voice which telleth thee that thou hast need of sunscreen, do not seek to excuse thyself - put on thy Scripture power!